Saturday, January 24, 2009

"Hide and Seek" (Music Review)

"Hide and Seek"
Freedom in the Groove
Joshua Redman

Joshua Redman: tenor saxophone
Peter Bernstein: guitar
Peter Martin: piano
Christopher Thomas: bass
Brian Blade: drums

A summa cum laude graduate of Harvard as well as one of the best saxophonists of his generation, Joshua Redman can express himself almost as stylishly with words as with notes. That's why he's one of the few jazz musicians who writes his own liner notes. Freedom in the Groove comes with a little memoir about how he's moved past his "jazz snob"bery to a more inclusive musical taste:

"These days, I listen to, love, and am inspired by all forms of music. And once again, I sense the connections. I feel in much of '90s hip-hop a bounce, a vitality, and a rhythmic infectiousness which I have always felt in the bebop of the '40s and '50s. I hear in some of today's 'alternative music' a rawness, an edge, and a haunting insistence which echoes the intense modalism and stinging iconoclasm of the '60s avant-garde."

The track with the most freedom and best groove is the hip-hop themed opener, "Hide and Seek." Ah, here is the "bounce," the "vitality," the "rhythmic infectiousness" Redman is talking about! As a dabbler in the saxophone myself, I know how hard it is to play anything without moving your body, even though the instrument forces your head down and ties up your hands, making you do a kind of awkward pelican dance. Guitarists dance for show, but sax players do it because they can't help it. Especially not on this song. I can't even listen without dancing.

It starts with Redman's tenor sax a capella, alternating some sparse phrases with a lip-popping technique that mimics a bass line. At 0:18, the rhythm section enters: the real bass takes over and continues a simple but beguiling rhythm, and the drums keep the beat but more or less stay out of the way. Redman states a rather complex, syncopated melody, and if you listen closely you can hear the piano hiding behind the saxophone, playing the same notes.

At 1:35, the rhythm changes noticeably, the piano gets put away, and Bernstein's guitar comes out of hiding. At 1:39 and 2:10 his riffs very satisfyingly fill in gaps in the sax solo; elsewhere he subtly makes the section more rhythmically and harmonically interesting. But of course, Redman's funky saxophone solo is the main attraction. The storytelling, the use of tension and release, the development of melodic and rhythmic motifs is masterful--but a lot less interesting to read about it than to listen to. Here are some things to listen for:

* The echoing of rhythms both long (like the first phrase) and short (like the two-note phrase at 1:53ff), as a development (2:53ff) or as a refrain (2:15).
* The lick at 1:51 works because it so simple, just three quarter notes of the same note in three octaves. The lick at 2:25 works because it so intricate, compared to the rest of the solo.
* The mellow release of tension at 2:09, followed by a head-banging re-entry; the sax and drums are in perfect sync here.
* The pulse in funk, including in this song, is in the first and third beats of the measure. This is where you expect strong phrases to start. But if you listen carefully from about 2:38 to 2:42, you'll find that Redman moves ahead of the pulse a little bit, then lets it catch up with him.
* At 2:51 the improvisation line, like a trapeze artist, is perfectly timed to land on the first note of the second unison section. What we have here is a hipper version of the melody, similar but busier. Note the record-skip effect at 3:12, and the accelerating, oscillating final flourish of the saxophone.

We've been so enthralled, we haven't noticed that in the mean time the guitar has dropped out again and the piano has once again re-entered. Starting not quite as lazily as Redman did, Martin quickly ratchets up the energy level by pounding ever harder with his left hand.

And then, before you know it, we're back where we started. As much as we want the groove to keep going, it has to end. Yet there's one more surprise ahead. The fade is a fake; the finish is a flash.

Wednesday, January 21, 2009

Pick Up Some Rocks (Speech)

Commencement speech for Judson International School, 2008

The sun had just dipped below the rocky hills on the western horizon, and Cody knew from experience exactly how much time he had before dusk would give way to the cold, starry desert night. “Just give me five more minutes, boy,” he said as he patted the neck of the galloping horse underneath him. And then he heard it: a voice, deep and clear and masculine, as if right behind his left ear. “Pick up some rocks and put them in your saddlebag.” Cody jerked the reins sharply backward, bringing the horse to a sudden halt. The flat and barren landscape afforded him a view of miles around, and not another soul could be seen. He had heard enough stories from other cowboys to know that a man’s imagination often begins to play tricks on him after many days in the lonely desert. Still, it had never happened to him before. The horse had started walking again, and Cody spurred it into a faster gait. Then he heard it again, just the same as the first time: “Pick up some rocks and put them in your saddlebag.” Quite unsettled, but determined to keep riding, he cursed under his breath and flung out his arm as if to brush the voice away. But it only repeated, this time louder, with an authority and an urgency that could not be ignored, “Pick up some rocks and put them in your saddlebag.” At this point Cody knew that the only way he could make this eerie, disembodied voice leave him alone was to do what it said. So once again he brought his horse to a halt, this time for good, and with a sigh he dismounted. He stroked the sweaty, heaving sides of the tired bay stallion. Then he untied the leather strings of his dusty saddlebag, bent down, scooped a small handful of gravel into his callused palm, and dropped it into the pouch, whacking it savagely a couple of times for good measure. “Are you happy?” he sneered, turning around. After watering his horse and dining on baked beans cooked over a sagebrush fire, he curled up with his saddle and blanket and tried with all his might to banish the memory of the voice from his mind. Dawn came soon enough, and as Cody saddled his horse again for another hard day’s ride, he suddenly remembered what had happened the night before. He was almost convinced that it was a dream, but just to make sure, he decided to reach into his saddlebag to see if the rocks were there. And what he found nearly knocked him off of his feet. For he held in his hand not gravel, but unmistakable solid gold nuggets. His whoop of joy must have startled all the vultures, snakes and jackrabbits for miles. But it wasn’t long before he himself was startled by a much more sobering thought: “These few little pieces will scarcely get me out of debt. There’s no shortage of rocks in the desert--why didn’t I pick up more? I could have put a great big diamond ring on my girl’s finger, settled down in a big country house, and never had to work again!” But realizing that the voice was gone, the opportunity past, he kicked himself and rode on.

You were all probably afraid that my story would have a moral, and you were right. Every high school student at some point asks the question, “Why do I have to be here? When am I ever going to use this? Why are they forcing to me to learn about hyperbolas, the atomic weight of molybdenum, the ancient city of Mohenjo-Daro, or iambic pentameter when all I want to do with my life is be a stay-at-home parent, or a nurse, or a salesman, or a soldier, or an NBA player, or--since this is Judson International School--a missionary? And besides, I‘m just going to forget it when I leave.” The most common response you will hear is, “Well, you might need it after all at some point in the future.” And that’s true, sometimes surprisingly so. What may seem to you now like useless rocks, nothing but added weight, may turn out to be gold one day. Knowledge is power. Another analogy I find helpful is to think of your brain as a muscle. People who lift weights in the gym are primarily making themselves better at squats and bench presses and arm curls, and those by themselves are not very practical in “real life.” But the strength they gain in the process is useful for all sorts of tasks. In the same way, math teaches you to think carefully and logically and to solve difficult abstract problems, even if you forget how to do logarithms. Science gives you an appreciation of and a mastery over the natural world even if you forget the difference between sulfides and sulfites. History, the study of the past, helps you understand the present--what human beings are like, the way things are now, why they are that way, and why they don’t have to be and probably won’t always be that way--even if you forget which Roman Emperor came after Claudius. English makes you better at speaking and writing, at organizing your thoughts, at paying attention to detail, at seeing patterns, at appreciating beauty, and at thinking about big issues, even if you forget which character is brutally murdered at the end of Pride and Prejudice. (Just kidding.) Furthermore, the better you get at any subject, the less painful it is, and you may even come to enjoy it for its own sake. And here’s something that they don’t usually tell you: all the hours in class listening to lectures, all the homework assignment sheets, all the essays, all the group projects, all the exams--they are training you to show up even when you don’t feel like it, to recognize authority, to follow directions, to plan ahead, to manage your time, to meet deadlines, to cooperate with others, to work hard even when you’re tired, and, very importantly, to endure boredom. These are skills that every job requires. I’m not kidding. Ask anyone.

High school is fun sometimes, but not always. If people tell you that your high school years will be the best time of your life, and it makes you want to throw yourself in front of the school bus, don’t worry--they’re probably wrong. Life will most likely get better after high school. But a lot of that depends on what rocks you pick up during high school. When your formal education is over, you may never get another opportunity to spend several years doing nothing but learning and developing your skills and character. Make the most of it while it lasts. Some rocks you should not expect to pick up, however, are (1) a soul mate, (2) a marketable skill, and (3) all the knowledge you will ever need for the rest of your life.

To use another rock metaphor, people at your age are like wet concrete. You are malleable, more than you realize. This is definitely not something to be ashamed of; it is an opportunity to seize. Everything about you, from the way you dress, to the music you listen to, to the beliefs and attitudes you hold, to your deepest character traits, will be molded into shape by others. By the time you are fully adults, the concrete will have set and become very difficult to change. And then eventually--I won’t say when--the concrete will become brittle and start to crumble! But right now you have the opportunity to choose who your molders are, and what form you will take. And you are responsible for who you become. From Bible times until today the Jews have initiated people about your age into adulthood by a ceremony called a bar mitzvah or bat mitzvah, which means “son of the covenant” or “daughter of the covenant.” That means that you are accountable to obey what is engraved by the finger of God on the two big stone tablets. In Christian terms, you are accountable for the fate of your eternal soul. Our susceptibility to peer pressure is part of how we are made as human beings, and is not in itself bad. Unfortunately, in high school you will almost definitely be subject to bad peer pressure, and there will be times when you will need to stand like a rock. How are you supposed to do that?

Though I’m far from an expert on this matter, I have two suggestions. The first is to think critically, to look at the big picture. Most of what people think is cool and uncool is arbitrary and what they have uncritically picked up from others. Try to stand back from the crowd and ask, “If celebrities have such miserable lives, why does everyone strive so hard to be like them? How many people actually like the so-called popular kids, and how many are just afraid of them? Is chewing gum really going to increase my sex appeal? Why are the guys in the chess club, or the Latin club, or the geology club so ostracized, and what exactly is wrong with getting good grades? Is getting stoned really worth it? Why are rock and hip hop so popular when jazz is clearly superior?” and so on. Find people who like you the way you are; people who make you sell out to be their friends don’t make good friends anyway. When someone says disdainfully, “You’re so sheltered,” realize that he probably means, “You’re different, and I can’t handle that.” When your parents embarrass you with their lack of coolness, realize that they were probably cool when they were in high school and that they think you’re weird, too. Unlike rocks, trends don’t last very long.

Second, and more importantly, Jesus said that the one “who hears my words and puts them into practice … is like a man building a house, who dug down deep and laid the foundation on a rock. When a flood came, the torrent struck that house but could not shake it, because it was well built.” You need to find your identity in the body of Christ. You need to judge the world’s values by the standard of God’s values, not vice versa. Practically speaking, this means time and effort and discipline: studying the Bible, praying, worshiping, being in fellowship with other believers. You may not be used to doing these on your own, or on your own initiative, but now is the time to start. They are essential parts of the mature Christian life. Try to be a witness, but don’t be discouraged if your seeds fall on rocky soil. You will be different, and that may be very difficult and even painful, but remember that diamonds are only formed under incredibly intense heat and pressure. Good night.

Three Poststructuralists Walked Into a Bar (Play)

[THE SCENE: Think Waiting for Godot. A vintage French bar, clean and in good repair, dimly lit, no windows. It could be any time of day or night. Smoke visibly wafts through the confined air, although the room is empty of bartender, patrons, and furniture except for three tall barstools that stand before the empty counter. The walls, the floor, and the shelves behind the counter are all bare. So is the counter itself, except for a large white bowl filled with unshelled, unsalted peanuts.]

[Enter LACAN, DERRIDA, AND FOUCAULT, one at a time. Each walks with a distinctive gait to his respective stool and sits down.]

FOUCAULT [breaking the silence]: Who would have expected that the three of us would ever be in the same room together?

DERRIDA: I thought you two were dead. Actually, I thought I was dead too.

LACAN: I don’t remember ever coming here before. I don’t even remember how I got here now. Where are we?

FOUCAULT: Hell if I know. Are those peanuts?

DERRIDA: [Lifts the bowl and passes it to FOUCAULT. A sheet of paper underneath it, hidden until now, floats to the floor. He stands up, bends over, and picks it up.] It’s a poem. The title is “The Flea,” but no author is given.

FOUCAULT: Three literary theorists, one poem, and no drinks. What else are we going to do? Let’s read it. [DERRIDA hands it to him. FOUCAULT reads “The Flea.” See appendix for text.] Don’t worry; although you two are both good-looking men, and I am a homosexual, and I just read you a seduction poem, it means nothing. [Laughs.]

DERRIDA [to FOUCAULT]: Are you done reading? [Chuckles.]

LACAN: [Gets up.] Excuse my absence; I’ve never been one to flee from a literary discussion, but I have to use the john. [Leaves.]

DERRIDA: Absence… john… and notice that the first word of this poem is “Mark.” It is significant, Michel, that you are not Donne reading. The author of this poem is, in the most literal sense, absent. That is because he is, in the most literal sense, dead. All we have left of him are his traces, marks on paper. Yet “if one admits that writing (and the mark in general) must be able to function in the absence of the sender, the receiver, the context of production, etc., that implies that this power, this being able, this possibility is always inscribed, hence necessarily inscribed as possibility in the functioning or the functional structure of the mark.”

FOUCAULT: Samuel Beckett said, “What does it matter who is speaking?” Remember, Jacques, that the author is dead in a figurative sense as well. For ‘author’ does not mean ‘writer.’ “An anonymous text posted on a wall probably has a writer—but not an author. The author function is therefore characteristic of the mode of existence, circulation, and functioning of certain discourses within a society.” The death of the author is simply the discovery that he never truly existed in the first place—that he is a social construction, a creation of discourse.

DERRIDA: What do you mean by the “author function”?

FOUCAULT: Like all discursive functions, the author function is an exercise of control: not a simple and spontaneous event but “a series of specific and complex operations.” Historically, the invention of the author “constitutes the privileged moment of individualization in the history of ideas.” First, it controls what can be said or written. The importance of attributing words, texts, ideas to specific individuals arose in the Middle Ages “to the extent that authors became subject to punishment”—that is, it arose out of the need to control what was said. Even then, discourse was not a thing to be owned but an act to be performed. But with the rise of capitalism, texts began to be seen as property, which by the beginning of the nineteenth century brought into a being a new form of control: copyright laws. Second, the author function controls which texts are privileged. “It has not always been the same types of texts which have required attribution to an author.” In ancient times, and in the Middle Ages, ‘literary’ texts were valued even if anonymous, “since their ancientness was regarded as a sufficient guarantee of their status.” ‘Scientific’ texts, however, were authoritative only when they were attributed to an authority, such as Aristotle or Ptolemy. By the eighteenth century, this situation had reversed itself. An epistemological break, shift, or rupture had taken place. The new ‘scientific method,’ which (in its own words) emphasized ‘reason’ and ‘observation,’ had ousted the old practice of deferring to the ancients on questions of nature. Scientific texts were now seen as valid by virtue of the universality and repeatability of their findings. But literary texts…

DERRIDA: If I may interrupt, and bring the discussion back to the poem at hand, you mentioned repeatability, and I think that it’s this structure of repeatability, or what I call ‘iterability,’ that both extends and limits the power of signs. “No meaning can be determined out of context, but no context permits saturation.” That is, it is the nature of a sign that can be repeated in different contexts, but since the context is different each time, the meaning of the sign will be different each time as well. We can see this in “The Flea” with, for example, the word ‘this.’ It’s used several different ways: “this flea” (line 1), “mark in this” (end of line 1), “this cannot be said” (line 5), “this our marriage bed” (line 12). You may be thinking that this is not a startling discovery, for this shifting of reference is the nature of a pronoun. But still, from the fact that no two instances of ‘this’ are ever identical—that it never means the same thing twice—it follows that the meaning of ‘this’ can never be fully present to us. Not even for the author-speaker-writer. “Writing is dangerous from the moment that representation there claims to be presence and the sign of the thing itself. And there is a fatal necessity, inscribed in the very functioning of the sign, that the substitute make one forget the vicariousness of its own function and make itself pass for the plenitude of a speech whose deficiency and infirmity it nevertheless only supplements.” To put it another way, the supplement can never fill the void; it will always itself require a supplement. Consider what happens when we try to pin down the meaning of, say, the ‘this’ at the end of the first line. Immediately when it is uttered, it has no reference at all. It is a ‘this’ of anticipation. Its content is suspended, deferred to the next line. Yet the next line reads, “How little that which thou deniest me is.” Once again the meaning is deferred: how little is that ‘little’? Indeed, for the rest of the poem the speaker tries to answer this question. But as he does so his analogy-argument raises metaphysical, moral, even biological questions, and like Tantalus, the further he follows it the further it recedes, endlessly. This endlessness characterizes all texts. So it was half in jest that I asked you earlier, “Are you done reading?”

FOUCAULT: And, as I was about to say earlier, it is this elusiveness of meaning and consequent proliferation of interpretation that is the enemy of power, that society cannot tolerate, that the author function was meant to stop. [Puts the poem down on the counter and places the bowl of peanuts on top of it.] So the third way the author function exercises control is by fixing meaning, by limiting interpretation. The ‘author’ is “a constant level of value”—all of his texts must meet a standard of ‘quality.’ He is “a field of conceptual or theoretical coherence,” meaning that his ideas hang together without contradiction. He is a “stylistic unity” and “a historical figure at the crossroads of a certain number of events.” Of course, “these aspects of an individual which we designate as making him an author are only a projection, in more or less psychologizing terms, of the operations that we force texts to undergo, the connections that we make, the traits that we establish as pertinent, the continuities that we recognize, or the exclusions that we practice.” So the author function is what keeps me from attributing “The Flea” to Walt Whitman.

DERRIDA: Or reading it as a speech by one Tibetan Buddhist monk to another.

FOUCAULT: Exactly. And it’s what causes you to read it as ‘poetry’ rather than prose, as a ‘work’ with inherent value, as a unity, and so on. It lumps it into that discursive formation, the category of ‘literature.’

DERRIDA: I would have to agree. “There is no such thing as a literary essence or a specifically literary domain strictly identifiable as such… this name of literature perhaps is destined to remain improper, with no criteria, or assured concept or reference, so that ‘literature’ has something to do with the drama of naming.”

[Suddenly FOUCAULT chokes on a peanut. LACAN returns just in time, puts his arms around him from behind, and thrusts his knuckles into FOUCAULT’s solar plexus until the peanut in question rockets across the room.]

DERRIDA: Who taught you the Heimlich maneuver?

LACAN: Who taught me everything I know? Sigmund Freud.

FOUCAULT: It’s uncanny that you got back right when you did. That peanut could have killed me!

DERRIDA: Heimlich… Freud… kill… uncanny... That reminds me an essay that Freud wrote in 1919, called “The Uncanny.” ‘Uncanny’ is the English translation of the German word unheimlich, which is of course the opposite of heimlich, and Freud spends several pages listing dictionary definition after dictionary definition, trying to convey the sense of the latter word. (It means, roughly, ‘familiar.’) But at the end of this section, something very curious happens: the meanings of heimlich and unheimlich begin to shade into one another. “Heimlich comes to have the meaning usually ascribed to unheimlich.” Freud tries to explain the significance of the shift this way. Heimlich has another meaning, ‘hidden’; perhaps the connection is that both the familiar and the hidden are very close to us, very private. That which “ought to have remained secret and hidden but has come to light”—that is, become familiar—is strange and frightening to us, both heimlich and unheimlich at once. My point is that this phenomenon, which I sometimes playfully call “the heimlich maneuver,” in which a word comes to mean both itself and its opposite, is quite common in language. We see it in “The Flea” with the word ‘kill’ in line 16. It has its current meaning, of course, but the speaker is punning on a second meaning: in the seventeenth century ‘die’ was slang for sexual intercourse. Why would this same word refer both to the act of destroying life and the act of creating it? Because, as I have always said, every word is inscribed into its opposite. Bringing a new life into the world also brings a new death into the world that wouldn’t have happened otherwise, since everyone who is born will one day die. And everything depends for existence on the non-existence of the other. Creating this particular life excludes the possibility of creating other lives.

LACAN: Everyone knows that, Jacques. You’ve always been good at stating the obvious. But in the unconscious we find a much more profound connection between sex and death. In Beyond the Pleasure Principle, Freud wrote that the psyche has two drives: Eros, the pleasure principle, and Thanatos, the death drive. ‘Drive’ is not the same as ‘instinct’; it organizes our thoughts and actions, it underlies all of our strivings but can never be satisfied, it keeps us always in motion, always in tension, always chasing after that indefinite missing something (what I call the ‘objet petit a’) but never catching it, always seeking to fill the void but always remaining empty.

FOUCAULT: When are our drinks going to come?

LACAN: Keep waiting, my friend. Freud was right about the drive, and about Eros and Thanatos as motivating factors. But he was wrong in making a sharp distinction between them. I’m surprised you didn’t point out another connection between sex and death in the poem. The speaker in the poem wants what the flea has—the mistress’s body—even though the flea dies in the third stanza. Unconsciously, at least, he wants both sex and death. In fact, “every drive is sexual in nature and at the same time every drive is a death drive.”

FOUCAULT: How do you mean?

LACAN: To explain this, I’ll need to take a long detour through my theory of the unconscious, the imaginary and symbolic orders, and jouissance. I hope you’re both comfortable.

DERRIDA: Well, considering that we’re not in France.

LACAN: When I was in the lavatory a few minutes ago, washing my hands, I looked up and saw a handsome Frenchman staring straight back at me. For me, seeing my own reflection in the mirror was not a very significant event. But for the infant such an experience is decisive. When he comes to recognize the image in the mirror as himself, he begins to grasp the distinction between himself and the world. At the same time, seeing himself from the outside, as other people see him, he appears unified, in control. The infant at this stage is still in the ‘imaginary order’ because he still identifies himself with images, not yet with symbols. This misrecognition, this illusion of the unity of the self, of ‘identity’ (Latin for ‘sameness’), that disguises the psyche’s inner fragmentation, brings the ego into being. Mediated through the other’s gaze, the ego is forever alienated from itself. What brings our infant—let’s call him ‘Jackie’…

DERRIDA: That was my given name, you know.

LACAN: Was it? Then it should help you to identify with him. As I was saying, what brings little Jackie out of the imaginary order and into the ‘symbolic order’ is the intrusion of a third party, the ‘Name-of-the-Father.’ You both know Freud’s story of the Oedipus complex; I don’t think it’s literally true, but I like to use it as an allegory. Because of the father, Jackie comes to realize that his mother’s desire is not only for him, and that he cannot have her all the time. He experiences lack, absence. He begins to learn language, which is founded on absence: we speak of things that are not there, and words only have meaning because of difference, by not being other words. And there is a more profound sense in which language is always lacking. You were on to something, Jacques, when you spoke of the logic of supplementarity, the impossibility of full presence. The relation of the signifier to the signified is always arbitrary. (That is why, on my trip to the bathroom earlier, I saw two identical doors, behind which were, I assume, two identical rooms, but one was marked ‘Ladies’ and the other ‘Gentlemen.’) But the process of signification can never cross the bar between signifier and signified; the signifier only ever refers to other signifiers, in an endless chain, and there is “an incessant sliding of the signified under the signifier.” We can never access the real, that which is behind the play of symbols. I call this feature of human existence ‘separation.’ But I digress. The other sense in which the entrance of the father pushes Jackie into the symbolic order is by defining him in a predetermined differentiated role in the symbolic structure of social relations. Jackie, as his mother’s son, cannot be fulfill his desire to be her lover (thus the father, as Law, enforces the incest taboo), and as his father’s son, he must submit to his authority.

FOUCAULT: That’s all very fascinating, but weren’t we talking about “The Flea”?

LACAN: Yes, I’m getting to that. If I am right that the speaker wants what the flea has, then the “suck’d … sucks” in line 3 and “pamper’d” in line 8 give the situation obvious Oedipal overtones. Speaker and mistress take on the symbolic positions of mother and child. What gives occasion to the poem—an instance of speech, of language, of the symbolic order—in the first place is the speaker’s unfulfilled and never fulfilled sexual desire for his mistress. The reason he cannot have her, and why the union he describes in words (the signifier) never comes to pass in fact (the signified) is because of a third party in the background, “though parents grudge,” the Name-of-the-Father, the imposition of Law, of prohibition, which is because of their symbolic status as unmarried. The mistress’s sole desire is not for the speaker; she desires to please this father-figure as well. The number “three” is everywhere in this poem, from the three stanzas with nine lines each to the allusions to the Christian trinity. But for the third party of the father, the speaker substitutes the third party of the flea. Having penetrated the mistress, having united its blood with hers, the flea represents the phallus—that ‘transcendental signifier’ of lack—and in the speaker’s mind it has finally attained jouissance—that ending point of signification, that which we never reach but always think the other has.

DERRIDA: All of that gives me an idea. This poem could be read as an attempted deconstruction of the married/unmarried opposition, but we’ll save that for another time. Instead, I’d like to focus on how the flea, as you described it, provides an interesting starting point for a deconstruction of sexual difference. What do I mean by deconstruction? Many structuralist thinkers have shown how our thinking forms a system of binary oppositions; a deconstruction seeks to dismantle these oppositions, to “demonstrate how one term of an antithesis secretly inheres within the other” (Eagleton 115). Some people misconceive of it as the Fishy business of making a text say whatever you want it to say; actually, the goal is carefully to draw out the inherent contradictions. In his Phenomenology of Spirit, Hegel performed the first deconstruction, or at least the most famous one, by showing how the master actually depends upon the slave for his identity. The master is a parasite, like a flea. Historically, the man/woman opposition coincides with a number of other oppositions, each of which is hierarchical and privileges the former term: master/slave, independent/dependent, active/passive, culture/nature, reason/passion, and so on. As the speaker compares himself to the flea, however, he subverts all of them. Though man has represented himself as independent and self-sufficient, the giver and provider, the speaker admits, perhaps unwittingly, that he is a parasite: he needs her to satisfy his desire, while she does not appear to need him. Indeed, man is, from conception, from birth, dependent upon woman, as the reference to sucking in line 3 suggests. Though, as the only one speaking in the poem, the speaker appears to be the master, the one in power, the mistress is in fact fully in control of the situation. In a stunning reversal, he becomes associated with an insect, the realm of nature, while in her chastity she represents the authority of cultural institutions. And his semblance of a logical argument thinly disguises an irrational passion.

LACAN: Speaking of disguises, let me continue from where I left off earlier in describing the formation of the psyche. As I explained, the ego is a creation of the imaginary order. The subject (Latin for ‘thrown under’), on the other hand, is a creation of the symbolic order. As we come to inhabit the symbolic order, we are subjected to a system that existed before us and will exist after us, that we did not create and that we cannot substantially change. It limits the ways we can think and the ways we can express our desire. You’ll notice that “The Flea” is written in first person. The pronoun ‘I,’ the necessity of thinking of ourselves as singular and unified, disguises the fragmentation of the self, the fact that “there is always a disjunction between the subject of enunciation and the subject of the utterance; in other words, the subject who speaks and the subject who is spoken.”

FOUCAULT: This plurality of reference of ‘I’ is even truer of writing. We commonly distinguish between the author and the speaker of a poem, but “all discourses endowed with the author function,” even mathematical textbooks, “possess this plurality of self.” Changing the subject, though, it’s disappointing to me that both of your interpretations have remained in the realm of abstract speculation about language or about the psyche, and that you’ve neglected the poem as material, socially embodied communicative act. What does the fact that the male is the sole speaker and the female is denied a voice tell us about the relations of power in seventeenth-century England? How is the speaker constructing the situation for the mistress with his discourse? How do the institutions to which the poem refers—the church, the family structure—exercise control? How does the poet perceive and present sexuality? These, to me, are far more interesting questions. [Yawns.] But they are questions for another time. Enough speaking about writing—I’m thinking about drinking. Where is that bartender?

DERRIDA: Like the messiah, like democracy, always coming, never arriving.

[Very long, Beckett-like pause. The walls begin to collapse.]

LACAN: You know, there’s something more than a little odd about what’s been going on right now, and I’ve just realized what it is. We’re all speaking in English! Using American idioms, no less! And our understanding of our own theories has been at the pathetic level of, say, a college sophomore. What is going on?

[In a mighty crash, the entire building caves in, leaving only the three theorists on their barstools, and revealing a dark, barren moonscape. Minos, the administrative demon of Dante’s Inferno, appears.]

LACAN: I get the feeling we’re not in Paris any more.

MINOS [in a thin and ghastly voice]: Well, this isn’t all that different, is it? You three certainly didn’t qualify for Heaven, or even Purgatory, and Plato decided he didn’t want your eternal company in Limbo either.

LACAN: It’s all your fault, Jacques!

MINOS: Here in the underworld we like to make the punishment fit the crime. Having your texts misread, having your ignorant successors put words in your mouths, having two other poststructuralists for company… it seemed so exquisite! Enjoy your stay.

[Fade to black.]

Walking on Water (Speech)

(The following was given at the Wheaton College Philosophy Department Chapel in March of 2007.)

I’d like to offer a meditation on Matthew 14:22-33, a passage that has fascinated me for a long time.

Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by himself to pray. When evening came, he was there alone, but the boat was already a considerable distance from land, buffeted by the waves because the wind was against it.
During the fourth watch of the night Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. “It’s a ghost,” they said, and cried out in fear.
But Jesus immediately said to them: “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
“Lord, if it’s you,” Peter replied, “tell me to come to you on the water.”
“Come,” he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, “Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. “You of little faith,” he said, “why did you doubt?”
And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, “Truly you are the Son of God.”


While I don’t think that Matthew had any allegorical intentions for this story, or that if he were here he would endorse everything I’m about to do with it, I do think it has some interesting analogies to the situation that all of us are in: trying to be Christian intellectuals.

Jesus’ disciples are in a boat on the Lake of Galilee during a fierce storm. This is something like the position of the church in society, and especially like the position of a Christian institution like Wheaton College in the subsociety of academia, or mainstream intellectual culture. Though I don’t want to exaggerate, the wind is against this boat. Academia operates with different assumptions, values, and commitments than Christians do; it plays by different rules than Christian thought does; it has created plausibility structures that are unfavorable to Christianity. Which is not to say that it is a stable environment: it is constantly being swept by powerful “winds” (academic windbags) and “waves” (academic fads). The boat is a relatively—but only relatively—safe place to be. Although it absorbs much of the shock, it is still “buffeted” by these winds and waves. For the last couple of hundred years or so, and for the foreseeable future, Christian thought has been mostly on the defensive, reacting and responding to challenges rather than setting the agenda.

But some people, like Peter, aren’t content to stay in the boat and for whatever reason want to feel the full fury of the storm. This was how I fancied myself when I came to Wheaton, and surely it’s true of many of the people here. It can’t be an accident that Wheaton has a larger share of philosophy majors than most colleges do. Plato was right in saying that philosophy begins with aporias, and bringing two worldviews into contact is a very effective way to generate these.

In my opinion, the path of the Christian intellectual should not be undertaken without fear and trembling. There are some very powerful and very persuasive challenges to Christian doctrines and Christian worldviews, some explanations and interpretations of things that seem to make better sense than traditional Christian ones. Furthermore, the gospel is foolishness to the Greeks (the philosophers) and a stumbling block to the wise (the learned, the intellectuals). It has elements that are dogmatic, offensive, and paradoxical nearly to the point of being irrational. I highly doubt that a completely satisfactory integration of faith and learning, free of tensions and anomalies, will ever be possible in this life. Certainly, trying to be both a Christian and an intellectual is harder than trying to be one or the other. Many people who try it either retreat back to the boat or sink, and lose their faith. I’ve seen friends of mine do both. And I want to say that the former is by far the better option, and that there’s no shame in it. In many cases it’s not cowardice but prudence. I believe that God prefers the naïve believer to the sophisticated skeptic. Once I thought that all Christians should study philosophy, but now I doubt that it’s beneficial for everybody all the time. Jesus doesn’t command Peter to get out of the boat—it is Peter’s idea—and he doesn’t rebuke the other disciples for not getting out. In fact, Jesus’ most beloved disciple, John, stays inside.

I don’t want to paint too bleak of a picture, but we don’t do anyone any favors by denying or downplaying these dangers. They are real. And I don’t mean to imply, by the way, that “we scholars, we philosophers” are a spiritual elite with a superior vocation. Every path has its own spiritual dangers, and those of philosophy are probably not the greatest. We may analyze imagined ethical dilemmas in philosophy, but we are unlikely to be put in real ones.

So, in light of all I’ve said, why should we Christians try to be intellectuals too? Why should we subject ourselves to these hazards? When Peter sees Jesus in the distance, walking on the water, he is just not content to stay in the boat. By virtue of his personality, he is impelled to go to him, to see this miracle and this marvelous man up close. Now, all of us have probably been asked why on earth we’re studying philosophy, how we plan to make money with our philosophy degrees, and so on. And we realize that there is no convincing practical or utilitarian justification for it. But some of us are just impelled; by virtue of our personalities—which are quite different than Peter’s in this respect, but remember that this is an analogy—we are fascinated by abstract problems, captivated by intellectual beauty, moved by the love of wisdom for its own sake. And as Christians, we have an even deeper motivation. Different people experience God in different ways, and for us, the way to our hearts is through our brains. We want to love God with all our minds, and we want that love to abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight. We want to know God and the world he has created, including ourselves, with as much clarity and fullness as is humanly possible. We feel that we can only do this if we commit ourselves to rigorous intellectual honesty, experiencing the full force of the challenges to that knowledge. And like Peter, we trust that, though what we are doing is dangerous, Jesus will keep us safe.

Peter gets out of the boat and walks a few steps. I imagine that he is thrilled, because men don’t defy gravity—but terrified, because men don’t defy gravity. Like deconstruction, but much, much better, this is “an experience of the impossible.” His mind can only sustain the tension for a few steps, when the terror wins out, and he begins to sink. He cries out, and immediately Jesus catches him by the hand and pulls him to safety. “You of little faith,” [Jesus] says, “why did you doubt?”

I’d like to give Jesus some credit here by avoiding an anachronistic reading of these words. Peter’s conflict is, importantly, not between “reason” and “faith.” Especially not when, as is too often the case, reason is conceived as grounded belief and faith is conceived as ungrounded belief. In my epistemology seminar we entertained and rejected the thesis of “doxastic voluntarism,” the idea that you can make yourself believe a proposition p, irrespective of its plausibility, just by deciding to. If we were right that this is impossible, it would be unfair of Jesus to demand it. To digress a bit, however, something you can learn in philosophy is that pitting reason against faith is a false polarization. There are a hundred ways to show that there can be no view from nowhere, no complete escape from epistemic circularity, and no thinking without presuppositions; there can be no self-evident truths, no indubitable beliefs, and no inescapable arguments; all thinking, even the most rigorously scientific, must involve relying on authority, privileging some intellectual values over others, and being committed to ideals and to extra-rational goals. Philosophy qua philosophy is too limited in scope to answer many of the specific objections to Christianity, but it can help you avoid the dangerous fallacy of judging Christian beliefs against false standards of rationality.

Anyway, Peter suffers a great deal of cognitive dissonance, but of a different sort. On the one hand, he has an intuitive grasp of the laws of physics and physiology. He knows that he can’t stay afloat in stormy waters, and that if he sinks, he will drown. And this is not just theoretical for him, it is so deeply ingrained that walking on the water terrifies him. On the other hand—and this is the key—he knows that Jesus is much more than a man. He has seen him work miracles in the past, with his own eyes he sees him walking on the water now, and he has Jesus’ assurance that he will be safe. So you could say that Peter has at least as much evidence, at least as much of a rational case, at least as much epistemic justification, for trusting Jesus as for doubting him—although it’s a very different, incommensurable kind of justification. Peter has already affirmed Jesus’ divinity verbally, and this is a chance for him to affirm it, if you like, existentially. The great challenge for him now is to hold to this belief, to focus on the person of Jesus who is waiting for him on the lake, against the very strong power of his human instincts and emotions and the very real wind and waves that are surrounding him. But holding these truths in his mind is an act of the will. And it is for this failure that Jesus chides Peter. I think you will find that whenever the Bible talks about faith and doubt, it means it in this sense. Others may read the scene differently, but I imagine that Jesus is disappointed but not angry here, and that his voice is not harsh but gentle. At least Peter was willing to make the attempt, and no other mortal has ever walked as far on water as he did.

To elaborate this theme a bit I’m going to quote, without apology, from C. S. Lewis. This is from The Great Divorce, a conversation between one of the citizens of heaven, Dick, and one of the citizens of hell, a former believer.

“Do you really think people are penalized for their honest opinions? Even assuming, for the sake of argument, that those opinions were mistaken. […] There are indeed [intellectual sins], Dick. There is hidebound prejudice, and intellectual dishonesty, and timidity, and stagnation. But honest opinions fearlessly followed—they are not sins. […] [Mine] were not only honest but heroic. I asserted them fearlessly. When the doctrine of the Resurrection ceased to commend itself to the critical faculties which God had given me, I openly rejected it. I preached my famous sermon. I defied the whole chapter. I took every risk.” “What risk? What was likely to come of it except what actually came—popularity, sales for your books, invitations, and finally a bishopric? […] Let us be frank. Our opinions were not honestly come by. We simply found ourselves in contact with a certain current of ideas and plunged into it because it seemed modern and successful. […] We were afraid of crude Salvationism, afraid of a breach with the spirit of the age, afraid of ridicule, afraid (above all) of real spiritual fears and hopes. […] Having allowed oneself to drift, unresisting, unpraying, accepting every half-conscious solicitation from our desires, we reached a point where we no longer believed the Faith. Just in the same way, a jealous man, drifting and unresisting, reaches a point at which he believes lies about his best friend: a drunkard reaches a point at which (for the moment) he actually believes another glass will do him no harm. The beliefs are sincere in the sense that they do occur as psychological events in the man’s mind. If that’s what you mean by sincerity they are sincere, and so were ours. But errors which are sincere in that sense are not innocent.”

God seems to have a great respect for our cognitive autonomy. He seems unwilling, most of the time, to reach in and change our beliefs or to take away our doubts, even when we want Him to. But he has given us ways to stay faithful. Our minds work in coherentist fashion: we throw explanatory nets around the facts and theories that float to the surface of our consciousness. It’s also just a fact of our psychology that the facts and theories nearest the surface will be the ones we have most recently, or most powerfully, been exposed to. That’s why it’s important to continue dredging up the ones that bolster our faith—especially when we are bombarded by disturbing evidence, arguments that make Christianity seem very weak and pale and implausible, and the very powerful and not-to-be-underestimated social pressure to conform once we step out from under the Christian umbrella. This reminding is one of the reasons why we share our testimonies, remember God’s activity in the lives of others now and in the past, study the Bible, listen to sermons that tell us what we already know, participate in the liturgy, and worship. This isn’t my idea, it’s at least as old as Deuteronomy, when God institutes the yearly feasts to commemorate his mighty acts of deliverance, tells the Israelites to talk about the commandments “when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up,” and warns them, “be careful you do not forget the Lord, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery.”

These acts of remembering—which again are acts of the will—are vital spiritual disciplines. But I don’t claim that they make anyone impervious to doubt. Not even the presence of Jesus in the flesh, right in front of him, keeps Peter from doubting, and I doubt that any of us can do better. When Peter begins to sink, he cries out for help. I hope that you and I, when we begin to sink, will always have the humility to cry for help as well, to say, “Lord, I want to believe, help my unbelief.” If I can share some of my own experience, I can think of three or four times in the last few years when I nearly reached the breaking point, when the cognitive dissonance was nearly unbearable. Each of those times, I had to surrender my intellectual pride and decide that my identity as a Christian was more important than my self-image as a thinker. I am not a very spiritually sensitive person, but those are some of the few times I am willing to say that I have felt the hand of God. Those are the moments that I need to continually bring to the surface of my mind. And it was only after those crisis moments, after sorting out those priorities, that I began to see new possibilities for integration.

In conclusion, if I had to boil down my four years of reflection on these questions to one statement, it would be this. If you take this narrow path of trying to be a Christian intellectual, if you decide to walk this tightrope, you probably won’t remain a Christian unless you really want to. If you aren’t committed, you will find it easy to leave the faith and easy to justify your decision. But if you are committed, though you may undergo some mental anguish and spiritual strife along the way, you need not fear losing your soul. I hope that I, and everybody here, will one day join the great crowd of witnesses who testify to this.

Madame Bovary (Poem)

My experiment with a humorous form called the "double dactyl" or "higgledy-piggledy."

Poor Madame Bovary!
Marriage and life in the
countryside aren’t what she
dreamed of, somehow.

Flagrant adultery,
habits of purchasing
greatly beyond what her
means would allow,

go undetected by
Charles, her husband, whose
wits aren’t much sharper than
those of a cow.

Creditors knocking, she
ends her existence with
handfuls of arsenic.
Look at her now!

On the Wheaton Quad (Poem)

Upon a grassy meadow kissed with snow,
Where in the spring, lads love the discus throw,
East of the healer and apothecary,
West of the convent and the monastery,
South of the great hall of the alchemists,
Beside the fountain whose refreshing mists
With winter’s advent every year run dry—
Awaiting thee, in earnest, shall stand I.

To a Pretty Girl (Poem)

“A flock of sheep just shorn”—thus Solomon
described a lady’s smile. My lesser pen
and smaller repertoire of metaphors
can’t find an apt analogy for yours.
But surely I could be inspired to find it
if I knew the lovely lady who’s behind it.
Let us arrange a place and time to meet;
until then, may your days and nights be sweet.